The 4th of July was celebrated in very patriotic form this past weekend. In addition to the swimming and grilling out, we added an early 3rd birthday party for Bauer and a much anticipated camp-out at the lake complete with smores.
There was a lot of stuff to get ready, a lot of stuff to take and then find, a lot of stuff to document on film, a lot of stuff that required flexible nap times, bedtimes and just overall schedules.
Overall just a lot of expectations in my mind which we all know can only lead down a slippery slope.
Amidst all the fun, there were a few classic breakdowns by yours truly.
There was the pinata breaking (part of Bauer’s “party) that left me almost hyperventilating because everyone had a better plan than everyone else on how to execute this FUN activity.
There was the getting all the kids ready to camp-out/swim/make smores after a day of no naps.
And then there was the crying Bennett who was unhappy and overtired due to the oppressive 100 degree heat at the 4th of July festival and Mommy needing him to stop being upset.
All normal things in this parenting world that I should have been able to internalize, formulate a plan for and then execute said plan. Or I could have a minor nervous breakdown and make believe the world was ending. Yes, that sounds like a more mature choice!
The aftermath of these daily breakdowns tends to involve a lot of apologies and an in depth dissecting of the journey with anyone who will listen. I tend to try to add humor to the situation to make it seem less STUPID. And most of all I tell myself next time I will not let it get me down. I won’t give in. I will learn to handle things better.
Basically I talk about it a lot and then set myself up for the ultimate fall.
Because we all know it is going to happen again. Because I’m still going to be exhausted. I’m still going to have 3 needy kids. Because I’m still going to be a control freak. Need I go on…
So when Sean and I finally got away for our hour jaunt on the Sea Doo sans kids, I told him that I wasn’t going to make any promises that the “Crazy Julie” phase was going to end any time soon. And I was going to stop putting pressure on myself to fix “it”. “It” will fix itself in time. Or at least that’s what I hope will happen. I can’t really even identity “it” yet so this is potentially the first problem in fixing “it” quickly.
I told him that hopefully next summer or a few years from now we will be able to look back and laugh saying “remember that summer when Julie went a little (or lot) crazy?” Just like we say remember that summer we lived in College Station and walked across the campus of A&M about 20 times a day in 100 degree heat because I worked for Admissions? Or remember that summer when I was a camp counselor at a camp with no air conditioning? Remember that summer when I was in Europe carrying a backpack that weighing like 700 lbs? Remember that summer when I lost my wallet and keys no less than 3 times?
This is just another memory in the grand scheme of life.
And I made it through all of those and love that I had adventures even though they weren’t all pleasant.
So if you see me this summer and I go off on you because you tried to “help” me do something, just know, it’s totally not you, it’s “crazy julie”. I just want you to feel included in the memories of “that summer” down the road!
Good thing its only July 5th….we’ve got so much “crazy” potential for the rest of the summer!
Thanks to everyone for putting up with me. Can’t wait to look back and know that this level of craziness was only temporary!
